Lest Dad's head get too big, let's discuss his gut

6:04 am. I am awake. I am grumpy? Maybe grumpy.

I stand beside Alice in the bathroom. She is washing her hands. I yawn and stretch. The bottom of my shirt raises to expose a bit of my belly.

Alice: Dad! You have a big tummy!

Me: Thanks.

Alice: It's huuuuuuge!

I look down.

Me: You think?

Alice: Oh yeah. It's like a beach ball.

Me: Really?

Alice: A beach ball with a belly button. NO WAIT! Your belly button is the thing you blow the beach ball up with!

She turns off the tap and dries her hands. She is very proud of her dad's-tummy-is-a-beachball analogy. She turns to walk out of the bathroom.

Alice: Anyway. It's a big tummy.